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One Word

The chair back digs under my arm as I squirm, ever so slightly.  I sit at one of the closing discussions at the Blissdom Canada social media conference, surrounded by others, and am asked to think of a word that defines who I am, what I do.  I am stymied.  I stall and think while others toss out answers.  Have I married who I am and what I do enough to find one word to encompass it all?  I am unsure.  But there are so many things I am sure of that I know unsure is not my word.

Later, I recount to a friend an experience that highlights my need for control in many areas of my life.  It amuses me to suddenly see myself so clearly, as though I had wiped away steam from a mirror with my sleeve.  Suddenly my reflection looks back at me, nearly winking at the trick.  I know my need to control certain parts of my life and my surroundings is more than an understudy in my little play, yet I know just as clearly that some the areas of my life I cannot control offer me the most satisfaction.  Control is not my word.

When I pause later to wonder what word I might choose as my own I consider all I do and my tendency to do more, think more, want more, miss sleep to accomplish more and wonder if it could be that simple.  Perhaps my word is more.  I want to do more, see more, be more.  However, a voice inside that occasionally begs me to be still also whispers “less” and I know that more is not my word.

My mind hums.  The evening wears on and we gather together to celebrate, to sing, dance, talk, laugh and embrace.  Each time I see someone I have wanted to meet for so long I reach for them.  We hug.  When a favourite song comes on or too long has passed since I have seen someone I like so much, I reach out as she does for a hand, an arm and we are again close and sharing the moment in laughter and music.

Morning comes.  I sit and try to think of all I want to write of the three days I have spent with intelligent, inspired women.  I reach for the words to express how I feel about them, about the experience.  I reach for ways to tell people how much it meant to me to meet them face to face.  I am sad that I cannot reach out and hug them all one more time.

I am inspired by so many ideas and suggestions from everyone at the conference.  I wonder how I will use them to reach others with my writing, reach more people.  I realize that this is most what I want to do when I sit down and put words to paper…to reach others.

Reach.  I realize that the word rolls easily around in my brain.  To me it implies a reaching out to others, reaching for connection, reaching out to hold those I feel close to.  I reach inside myself for nearly everything I need to make it through my days, and reach out to others when I need them.  I reach for dreams that may be distant on the horizon, but that I know lay beyond any distance or fog that may exist.  And I reach for happiness.  Every time I am given the choice, I reach for joy.

My one word is reach.

13 Responses to “One Word”

  1. jenadmin says:

    Thanks Harriet. What a hard thing to do!

    Trust me, “stuck” and “exhausted” happen around here too. Sort of a cause and effect thing from all the “reaching”.

    ; )

  2. Difficult to sum up a person in one word but I like reach. It implies so much more than a single word.

    In my darker moments I come up with LOST, STUCK and EXHAUSTED. On sunnier days, I get Friendly and enthusiastic.
    Nicely done!

  3. jen says:

    Thank you, lovely ladies. ; )

  4. beautiful post, and beautifully written

  5. Rebecca says:

    I love it Jen! A perfect one word.

  6. jen says:

    Yes! Ah. So happy to bring that memory back to you, it’s a favourite of mine as well. And yes, having everyone right where I could reach out and touch them, hug them, was amazing. Thanks for the loveliness. ; )

  7. EarnestGirl says:

    Your post summoned a moment in my mind’s eye, on the dance floor, a whole group of women, you among them, eyes, smiles, connected by the beat, so many women I’ve wanted to meet, thank, hug, all within reach. Lovely post. Lovely you.

  8. […] one word that you think describes you. It is a condensed version of an elevator pitch, I guess.  Little Miss Mocha wrote a great post on how she came up with her one word: Reach. As I thought about my word, my one word, I also thought about the panelists saying that your brand […]

  9. jen says:

    Paulina, thank you so much. ; )

  10. Love your post. Knowing who you are, even in a word, makes you appreciate who you are, who you have become. Thank you for sharing. Joy and happiness is always my dream.

  11. jen says:

    Thanks Sara.

    Loukia, thank you, yes, happy TO gave us more of a chance to chat than the blur that was NYC! xo back to you.

    Yukari, thanks for your sweet words online. Oh, and “connect” fought with reach for top billing for me. ; )

  12. Beautiful post. I had to re-ponder this question myself…and I am pretty sire my word is “Connect” :) I also like “Inspire” though.

  13. Loukia says:

    Good word, Jen. Great post. I love you and meeting you was amazing. Glad we spent more time together in Toronto, NYC was not enough. And I can’t wait to do it again. I have no idea what my word is. I’ll think about it…

  14. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Melissa Dimock, Jen , Mara Shapiro, Sara, Ann-Marie Burton and others. Ann-Marie Burton said: Beautiful! RT @littlemissmocha: Reflections of #BlissdomCanada: What #oneword best describes you/what you do? mine. […]

  15. Sara says:

    This is beautiful. Thank you for sharing.